Escape From The Afflicted

A while back I had to write an extract from a story for my GCSE coursework. Of course, with it being original writing, I did what anyone would have done - I 'borrowed' the idea from a video game . Since that game happened to be Guild Wars, and I've finally got my account here working, I decided to put it up.
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He looked to his left, then his right and then his left again. It was clear. He sat down to catch his breath, even though an alley was probably one the worst places. He didn’t mind though, as long as he was away from that thing.

What could it have been? Why did it pursue him? He huddled up for warmth as he pondered. As he was deep in his trail of thought, a dark shadow was cast at the other end of the alley. Silently, it crept closer, like an assailant stalking its victim. The alley slowly darkened as the creature made its way towards him; but still he didn’t notice. Just as it was about to pounce, he suddenly realised what was happening and he leapt to his feet and darted down the alley, closely followed by the phantom like stalker. He knew that he couldn’t outrun this creature for long, so he sharply turned down the next alley, and hid behind a stairway. The shadowy fiend stormed past him, just as he had hoped. He leant against the wall, panting. He wasn’t worried about catching his breath though, we was worried about how to escape from whatever was chasing him.



An hour or so had past, he decided it was a ‘now or never’ situation. Oil lamps dimly lit the area, a cold wind swept down the alley. A shadowy figure stood under one of the lamps. He knew what it was, except this time, he could see it. It looked like it was once human, but had somehow been changed. Tattered remains of clothing could be seen where the fleshy pink growths hadn’t covered. He could make out a face on the creature, but it was distorted, once again, by the growths. Its digits were stubby and the nails resembled claws or talons. There were numerous growths on its body; each was roughly the size of a head. The monstrosity slowly advanced on him, with a limp in its step. Its groan was so dull that he could feel it piercing his very soul. But this couldn’t possibly be the same thing that had been chasing him for hours on end; the silent, stealthy, swift stalker that had him on the run. This was a large, lumbering freak of nature. The creature put a foot forwards and slowly raised its heel. All of a sudden it leapt into the air, landing on and crushing the stairway as it came to the ground with a tremendous thud.



As the dust cleared, he got back up on his feet and looked around; the crumpled steel framing had completely blocked off one side of the alley, and the other way was a dead end. With no means of going upwards either, this meant that he was trapped! He could hear heavy footsteps in the shadows, but he couldn’t see the monstrous beast that he knew was making them. He was constantly looking behind his back as he knew that the creature would strike him form behind if he wasn’t looking. Suddenly, the footsteps stopped. And at the exact same time he could feel a strong, cold breeze. A candy bar wrapper was caught in the updraft and floated past the full, silvery moon. The drain covers burst, covering the floor in knee-height sewage water. He could see a large figure moving in the shadows, darting from corner to corner – waiting for him to drop his guard. He took a knife out of his pocket; and decided that he wouldn’t go down without a fight. Keeping his back to the wall, he circled the perimeter of the blocked-off alley; waiting for his opponent to reveal itself and make the first move.

Hours had passed; the only things that kept him awake were the adrenaline surging through his body and his fear of being brutally massacred by his stalker. Without any warning, he felt a powerful tremor beneath his feet; the concrete paving below him crumbled and churned into the earth. He hastily looked up and saw the monstrosity of a creature. It was crouched; with a large metal girder in its hands, probably from the collapsed stairway. He didn’t know how it could have salvaged it without him noticing, but this wasn’t the time for that. He charged at the beast and repeatedly jabbed it with his knife, but to no prevail. Before he could back away, or even brace himself, he was flung into the wall. He slowly slid down from the dented brickwork, feeling nothing but pain and barely able to move. The fiend moved in on him, ready to make the final blow; he hurriedly reached for his knife and blindly stabbed his foe. There was a loud crash; then silence. Had he been killed? Had he passed on into the great beyond? Using his last ounce of strength, he opened his eyes and lifted his bruised head. He had triumphed, what ever that thing was – it was dead. Knowing that he would probably die from his wounds; he closed his eyes and relaxed, as far as a person with broken limbs could. With the knowledge that he’d taken an evil being down with him, he knew that this was a good death; he kept the very thought in his mind as he slowly passed away.



Over the days, his body rotted away, along with that of the slain creature. Except, the creature’s corpse degraded differently, giving off sickly green fumes. It couldn’t get far as the air drowned it out, but a small cloud of it enveloped the man’s cold, lifeless body. His fingers twitched. Despite his shattered bones, he got onto his feet. He felt no pain; in fact he felt only one thing: the desire to kill.

Great story! Is nice to see we have so many talented people in the guild, just one more reason why (lea) is so great.

I like the story. You know how to put the surroundings in words and make a nice scene. People reading this will most likely see it happen infront of their eyes when they read it.

Good job.
More plox.